


Of Frogs and Gravy

by swan_mills



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: CURSED FIC, Crack, Cursed, F/F, F/M, Multi, Other, Smut, just read it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2018-12-11
Packaged: 2019-09-16 07:19:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16949517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swan_mills/pseuds/swan_mills
Summary: The Doctor is caught with her frog, Ryan insists on taking it. How will she get off now?





	Of Frogs and Gravy

**Author's Note:**

> For the discord. Y’all are gonna need some unsee juice after this one.

Between soil, biscuits and ham, the Doctor knew she had some weird kinks. She didn’t realise quite how unusual this particular one was, though, until Ryan caught her and her new pet frog in a very compromising position. The look on the poor boy’s face said it all.

“Please,” she begged him, trying to suppress her moans as the frog continued to lick at her dripping pussy. “Don’t tell Yaz.”

“I wont.” he had a sudden air of confidence, “but, you need to do something for me then.”

“What can I do fo-“ the Doctor began to enquire, her questioning cut off by her own breathy moan and the frog plunged it’s amphibian tongue into her tight hole.

“Let me borrow the frog.”

“Wha- right now?” he nodded in response to her question. “I’m using her, Ryan. Wait your turn.”

“Fine, I’ll just go and get Yaz then..”

‘God, this black male really new how to blackmail’ the timelord thought to herself.

“Fine. You can use the frog, but I still need to come. Want to help me out?”

“Not really.”

“Bu-“

“I can get Yaz to finish you off?”

“Ryan! I told you, she can’t know about the frog!” The Doctor complained.

“Fine then, what about granda- I mean Graham?”

The Doctor considered her options. She didn’t think Graham was her type, but then again, a week ago she never would’ve expected a frog would be either.

“Fine, get Graham.”

“You’re coming with me.”

“Why?”

“If I leave you here with the frog you’ll let her finish you off right now.” Ryan explained.

“No I wouldn’t!” Ryan gave her a ‘don’t lie to me’ look. “Okay fine, I would. I’m just really horny.”

“Then fuck Yaz! That’s what girlfriends do!”

“I know, but Yaz is still traumatised from our last shag.”

“Christ Doctor, what do you DO to that girl?”

The Doctor just gave him a wink before getting off of her sofa and walking with him to find Graham. He was stood in the console room, and the Doctor had to do a double take. She had never seen him look so handsome. Maybe it was the new sweater, maybe it was the smell of tea on his breath, or maybe she was just incredibly horny, but she couldn’t help thinking she should’ve spent more time enjoying their husband and wife charade back in 1955.

“You alright Doc? You’re stood awfully close to me.”

“Fuck me Graham O’Brien. Please. Fuck me like your life depends on it. I know you haven’t unloaded that beautiful package of yours since Grace died. You need this as much as I do.”

He couldn’t argue with that. He grabbed his sweater and threw it across the console room to reveal a tight button up shirt - almost too tight, his nips prominent through the fabric.

“Wait what, how are your nipples harder than Yaz’s get?” the Doctor asked, curious.

“Piercings, Doc. Grace loved to play with ‘em.”

“Interesting.”

The Doctor took off her shirt, her pants already unbuttoned and bunched around her knees from her foreplay with the frog.

“Graham, I’d like for you to rim me.”

“To what?” the poor old man was confused.

“Rim me. Lick my asshole. Now, please.”

“Doc, thats- no. I can’t do that. That’s disgusting.”

“You think THAT’S disgusting. Look at your grandson.”

Graham glanced over to the other side of the console where he saw Ryan, balls deep in a frog’s mouth, fingering his own asshole.

“Hm.. honestly that looks more fun than this, sorry Doc. I’m going to wait for Ryan to be done with Kermit over there, then I’ll fill the frog.”

The Doctor couldn’t help the look of hurt that flashed across her features, the rejection making her feel disgusting. Then she had an idea.

“Wait!” She yelled, running to the stairs to access the underneath of the console and returning moments later with a bright green fabric in her arms. A frog onesie.

“Here, I’ll put this on. Then can you please fuck me Graham? I need to come so bad.”

“I suppose so.” he gave in. “Why can’t Yaz though?”

“Why can’t Yaz what?” the brunette in question walked into the console room, somehow not noticing that the Doctor was half naked, shoving her legs into a onesie.

“Fuck me. Why can’t you fuck me, Yaz. That’s what he wants to know.” The Doctor explained.

“I can fuck you! I’m just a little tired of all of this vanilla sex we’ve been having. I mean, soil? Ham? Is that the best you can do Doctor? I need more - that’s why I’ve been off in my room getting rammed by a mud tendril for the past two hours!”

“You mean, my kinks didn’t scare you away?”

“Of course not! I wish you were even kinkier! Like Ryan, look at him!” Yaz gestures to the boy, face scrunched up as he nears his orgasm. “He’s fucking a frog! Now that’s more like it!”

“I WAS FUCKING THE FROG! IT WAS MY IDEA YAZ!” The Doctor yells, excited and also jealous that Yaz seems to be more interested in Ryan and the frog that she is in her right now.

“You were!? Oh my god, you’re perfect Doctor.” Yaz exclaims, throwing her arms around the onesie clad timelord and kissing her ferociously.

“Okay, I’m happy for you two, I really am, but who’s going to fuck me then? These pierced nipples won’t pleasure themselves, y’know.” Graham complains.

Yaz and the Doctor share a knowing look.

“I know just the thing.” Yaz grabs his hand and leads him down the corridor to her bedroom, “How do you feel about gravy, graham?”

“I love the stuff! Can’t have a Sunday roast without it. Why?”

Yaz pushes the man down onto the bed, the Doctor following, locking the door behind her and pulling a turkey baster out from behind her back.

“Yaz, pull his pants down please. Graham, on all fours.”

When the old man is in position the Doctor lowers the gravy filled baster to his asshole, gently pressing the tip in, just enough to part it and enter slowly.

“Fuck. That feels good guys. Have you tried this before?”

“Of course! The Doctor insists on doing this at least once a day! That’s why her ass tastes so good, like a nice roast!”

“Aw thanks babe.” The Doctor kisses Yaz. “Now, help me to fill him, it will be a tight fit!”

The Doctor forces the baster all the way into his ass, his hairy cheeks clenching around the foreign object.

“More Doctor, please.” He begs.

“Yaz, would you like to do the honours?”

“Always.” Yaz squeezes the baster, pumping gravy into the man’s hole.

“Fuck, oh fuck god wow that feels amazing, fuck don’t stop.” Graham screams.

It doesn’t take long for him to release his load all over Yaz’s bed, the sensation of the hot gravy in his ass too erotic for him to hold out for long.

“Wow Doctor, he likes it even more that you do!”

“Maybe so, but I like you more than anyone else does, and that’s what matters. You’re my main kink, Yasmin Khan. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Yaz kisses the top of her head, covered by the hood of her onsie.

“Now, I really wanted to fuck a frog today, and since the other one is occupied by Ryan,” Yaz says seductively. “This little froggy will have to do!”

She taps the Doctor on the nose, and the timelord moans. Noses.. please don’t let that be another kink. God, the feel of Yaz’s nose rubbing against her clit as she eats her out.. fuck. It’s a kink. Too late.

“Come here little froggy! There’s some mess on this bed for you to lick up before we can get started!”

Fuck.

The Doctor thinks this might be the best day of her life.

**Author's Note:**

> I’m sorry.


End file.
